Teens Grossly Unprepared for Life Beyond the Home by Gregory Bland

making-the-grade-gregory-bland

Today many children/teens will be returning home from school with report cards. Some will proudly present them to their parents. Others may be tempted to stuff them in a drawer and reluctantly pull them out in a weeks time when Mom or Dad ask, “Did you not get a report card last week?”

Parenting is no easy task, that’s true. There is so much for our children/teens to learn before they leave home. But they need much more than head knowledge. Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic are good, however they need much more than this to thrive outside of our homes.

They need a solid foundation that will support and enable them to navigate the challenges of life beyond the shelter of our homes. This includes a life perspective that flows from their understanding of who God is and how He impacts their lives, solid character, and strong personal disciplines, the ability to develop and foster healthy relationships, creating boundaries around their lives and time, financial management, and more.

It can seem overwhelming at times when we consider this. There can also be a temptation to believe that the schools are caring for these things. But the reality is many schools are focused on the core subjects that satisfy college admission as opposed to teaching basic life skills for thriving in the ‘real world.’

That’s where our role as parents shine. We have an incredible opportunity to invest within our children and teens and prepare them for life beyond the home. What better place to begin experimenting with decisions, making mistakes, evaluating their experiences, and applying that learning to life than a loving home environment?

As report cards are carried home and you begin to review them with your children, could I encourage you to look at another report card. A Life Skills Report Card*. (Some of you have used this in the past, so this may serve as a simple reminder to continue assessing areas of growth for your children/teens.)

Linked in this email is a practical tool that will help turn your and your child/teens mind toward personal life skills development. It can be an incredible catalyst for conversation and determining growth goals for your child/teen as they look beyond the report card to life on their own.

LIFE SKILLS REPORT CARD

Together we can create a legacy of relational health for generations to follow and prepare our children for life beyond the home.

Blessings today,
Your friend and pro-active parent coach
Gregory Bland

*Life Skills Report card based upon the work of Marlaine Paulsen Cover of Parenting 2.0

**photo credit dollarphotoclub.com 81314986

A Father’s Prayer for His Son

prepare-a-boy-gregory-bland A Father’s Prayer

Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to face himself when he is afraid; one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and humble and gentle in victory. Build me a son whose wishbone will not be where his backbone should be; a son who will know Thee—and that to know himself is the foundation stone of knowledge.

Lead him I pray, not in the path of ease and comfort, but under the stress and spur of difficulties and challenge. Here let him learn him learn compassion for those who fail. Build me a son whose heart will be clear, whose goal will be high; a son who will master himself before he seeks to master other men; one who will learn to laugh, yet never forget how to weep; one who will reach into the future, yet never forget the past. And after all these things are his, add, I pray, enough of a sense of humor, so that he may always be serious, yet never take himself too seriously.

Give him humility, so that he may always remember the simplicity of true greatness, the open mind of true wisdom, the meekness of true strength. Then, I, his father, will dare to whisper, “I have not lived in vain.”     —GENERAL DOUGLAS MACARTHUR,

Biological Reproduction vs Fatherhood

fatherhood-gregory-bland-the-legacy-centreIt’s easy, and frankly, quite an enjoyable experience for a man in producing a child.  The responsibility that follows the conception and birth of a child, though, is another story altogether.

I was raised by a single mom. My Dad was distant, not just geographically but emotionally and physically as well.  The role models for Fatherhood in my life were few and far between.  My point of reference left me feeling ill prepared at best. In short, the thought of Fatherhood scared me.

What would I do with a child?  How would I relate to him/her?  Could I love them and be committed to their growth in maturity?  Do I have what it takes to be more than a biological donor and become a young man and/or young lady’s Father?

Please set aside the stereotypical image of Father’s today. Sitcoms depict us as forgetful, undependable, and dim-witted.  Fatherhood today is downplayed significantly despite the research that affirms over and over again the incredible importance a Father plays in a child’s development toward healthy responsible adulthood.

If you’re a Dad or a young man who struggles with the idea of being one can I encourage you with the fact that your role as Father is incredibly important. You’re role as an involved Father is needed.  And your role as a Father is valued by the children who call you Daddy.

Until next time, may your act of Fatherhood intentionally invest in the adult your child is becoming.

Your friend and Pro-Active Parent Coach
Gregory Bland
Pro-Active Parent Coaching &
The Legacy Centre

 

Happy Mother’s Day

Happy-Mothers-Day-Gregory-Bland

Although we need to acknowledge the value of MOM each and every day, Mother’s Day is a perfect time to celebrate the mothers in our lives

Finding ways to show our respect, appreciation, and love for the moms in our lives makes Mom feel appreciated, but also helps our children develop gratitude that will last a lifetime.. It isn’t about spending lots of money or making a huge gesture but rather taking the time to find ways to show that you are mindful about Mom.

Here are three ways that you and your kids can make mom feel extra special this May:

 Make a card

Offer your child some paper, pencil crayons, and unleash their creativity. Some of the greatest cards Mom’s receive are not those purchased in a store, but rather penned from their own child’s hands.

Have your kids make a card for a mom in their life and include something about what they like most appreciate about her.

Homemade cards are special because they are personalized expressions of our love and appreciation. Best of all, they work at any age.

Create a Meal Together and serve to Mom

Taking time to create a family meal together is an incredible way to connect with our children, but also blesses Mom with a break if she is the one who typically prepares the meals.
Give Mom the experience of a ‘night off’ by making her dinner. Encourage your kids to ask Mom questions about herself and share stories themselves while you eat. What’s her favorite movie? What’s the most fun trip she’s ever been on?

Make a ‘coupon’ book

Putting together a “coupon” book of things that children and teens can give back to mom has been a great Mother’s Day gift for a reason. It is a creative way kids can ‘give back’ to mom with no expectation of anything in return. Also this gift keeps giving long after Mother’s Day has ended.

They could offer a . . .

“Free Hug. Just Because.”
“Massage. After a long day on your feet.”
“Grocery Shop.”
“Drive a younger sibling to baseball practice.”

Mom does so much. Let’s show her how much we care, not only today, but each and every day.

Remember. If you don’t live with Mom any more a phone call goes a long way in keeping relationship alive.

Happy Mother’s Day Mom!

Until Next time let’s treat Mom right
Your friend and Pro-Active Parent Coach
Gregory Bland
Pro-Active Parent Coaching
The Legacy Centre

Fathers, You Can’t Afford a Stay-at-Home Mom

stay-at-home-mom-gregory-blandI’ve had this thought in my head for a while now. I’ve been thinking that I can’t afford for my wife to be a Stay-At-Home Mom. Now, I don’t at all mean to offend anyone with this post. I just have to say that for me personally, I can’t afford it. I’d like to explain exactly what I mean by that so that no one thinks I’m in any way devaluing Stay-At-Home Moms. On the contrary, I mean that I quite literally cannot afford my wife to be staying at home. Here’s why…

My wife stays home and takes care of our son every single day. She changes his diapers, feeds him, plays with him, puts him down for his nap, and comforts him when he’s upset. And that’s just the bare minimum. A child can typically get that attention at a day-care. But on top of that, he is her only focus. There’s no other children to tend to. He gets all of her. All of her love, all of her time, all of her energy. She is always there, always near, and always listening. Obviously, this is part of being a parent. You take care of your child and you raise your child. But let’s face it. In our day and age, every service (and I mean EVERY service) is hireable. There is a company ready and willing to do just about anything. So while, yes, my wife is my son’s mother and it is a natural result of being a parent to love and care for your own child, there is also a very quantifiable dollar amount that can be attributed to the services rendered. I am in no way trying to simplify, objectify, or devalue the priceless love of a mother for her child. But let’s be real. Pay day feels good for a reason. Because you’re seeing your hard work appreciated in a tangible way that lets you “treat yo self”. And this is exactly why I can’t afford my wife being a Stay-At-Home Mom. The national average weekly salary for a full-time nanny is $705. That’s $36,660 a year.

Read the rest of the story on weareglory.com

Equipping Parents to Connect with and Empower their Children.